Super Bowl XLV: Good, Bad, Ugly

Last night was an evening of epic television. No, I'm not talking about "Glee" does "Thriller" (though I will most likely blog about that later). I'm talking about Super Bowl XLV: Steelers vs. Packers. Black & Gold vs. Green & Yellow. Terrible Towels vs. Hats Made of Synthetic Cheese. If you're looking for a blow-by-blow recap of the game or a side-by-side look at Mike Tomlin's game plan as compared to Chuck Noll's in days of yore, you've come to the wrong place. No, I don't know what an illegal block in the back is and I can't remember if it's "laces in" or "laces out," no matter how many times I see "Ace Ventura," but I hope you'll read on anyway to find out what an average Steelers fan (with above-average writing skills) thinks of the NFL's biggest night in football.

The Good:

• Withitness. When I was a young lass in teacher training at Grove City College, we learned a term called withitness, which was used to describe a teacher's ability to be aware of what is going on in the classroom at all times. I'm going to use this word in the football realm to describe the way the Steelers tend to stay in a game, no matter what obstacles lie before them. A lot of teams would have thrown in the towel after two interceptions and an 18-point deficit, but not our boys in black & gold. Somehow, after all of that, the game last night came down to two minutes on the clock and the ball in Ben's hands. We couldn't execute like we have in the past, but that doesn't change the fact that the Steelers keep it exciting. To think that a Super Bowl ring was only one Hail Mary pass away is the reason football, especially Steelers football, is my favorite sport. Maybe some fans prefer a more comfortable, blow-out win over a nail-biter, but not me. After all, my heart could use a little workout after all that bean & guacamole dip. Thankfully, withitness is one area of the Super Bowl in which the Steelers didn't fail to deliver.
• The fans. After attending Super Bowl XLIII in Tampa, the camaraderie among perfect strangers at a football game will never cease to amaze me. It doesn't matter if you're an 80-year-old, Miller-Lite-chugging grandma from Squirrel Hill or a large black man who takes up your whole seat and half of mine, if you're rooting for the Steelers, you are my new best friend (at least for the next three hours or so). During the game, I loved hearing chants of "Here we go, Steelers" rise above the roar of the crowd. After the game, I was proud to see how composed and gracious yinzers could be. Messages of "Better luck next year" and "Good game, Packers" won out over sour grapes in Facebook statuses and interviews on the local news. We may drink cheap beer and pronounce our words a little funny, but, I tell ya, Steeler Nation really does have class.

The Bad:

• Our Texan hosts. Everything may be bigger in Texas, but for Super Bowl XLV, it sure wasn't better. It started with sub-par weather conditions and civilians getting clobbered by falling ice and went downhill from there. Granted, Mother Nature and acts of God are beyond a host city's control, but selling seats that don't exist -- well, that's an avoidable error. For hours before the game started, news stations reported on the mess that occurred when thousands of ticket holders were herded into holding areas like livestock and told that their overpriced seats were now unfit for human consumption. And, like livestock, these ticket holders proceeded to get rowdy and pee where they stood. Yes, most of the scorned Super Bowl attendees were relocated and compensated for their troubles, but this is sure to go down as one of the biggest debacles in sporting-events history.
• The music. Christina Aguilera kicked off the night with a rousing rendition of her own personal version of the National Anthem, but I think when they say you should take artistic license, they don't mean with the lyrics to our country's most well-known song. I know "o'er the ramparts we watched" doesn't have nearly as much of a ring to it as "I'm a genie in a bottle, baby," but you think she'd have this one committed to memory. Don't get me wrong -- I honestly feel bad for Christina. She's had a rough year, what with the divorce and gaining a second chin and all, but, like Macy Gray and Roseanne Barr (Arnold?) before her, Christina isn't likely to hear the end of this one anytime soon. And as if one bad musical act wasn't enough, we had to endure a half-time show with the overly flashy, under-impressive Black Eyed Peas. Their songs are catchy, and no one in their right mind would want to see Fergie's breast, leaving the NFL at little risk for a "wardrobe malfunction," but the Peas' songs are much too processed to make for a good live show, in my opinion. If I had been accidentally blinded by looking directly into Fergie's sparkly shoulder pads, I might have mistakenly believed I was at a bad "American Idol" audition. Only this time I didn't have Simon Cowell to put me out of my misery.

The Ugly:

• The Steelers lose. This is an obvious one for a Steelers fan. I'm not sure if there's anything worse than being repeatedly told throughout the weeks leading up to the big game that your team won't win...and then having it come true. The Steelers like to prove people wrong. They thrive on being the underdogs, and honestly, in my lifetime, I'm not used to them falling short. I was only in fifth grade when the Steelers lost to the Cowboys, so I think I felt the impact a little more now that football is the highlight of my week rather than an afterthought between wearing stirrup pants and feeding the class guinea pig. I am sure that in a few days, my heartache will subside (especially if they crop-dust the city with antidepressants as they suggested on DVE), but until then, all I have left to say is good game, Packers, and better luck next year, boys.