Survivor: China: Chicken Gets His Head Cut Off

Needless to say, my first prediction of the Survivor: China voting order was dead wrong. Todd wasn't nearly as flamboyant as I thought he'd be right off the bat, though he did have a few, "Oh, no, you di'nt" moments in there. His tribe ended up with the immunity idol, so from there on out, my chances of a perfect record were shot. Chicken was the first to have his head on the chopping block, and although he didn't run around wildly for 15 minutes after he was voted off, he did manage to shock his fellow tribemates by exclaiming, "DAMN!" after the final vote was read. And when Jeff gave him the usual "the tribe has spoken" line, his response was one of the best I've heard yet -- a downtrodden, yet arrogantly toned, "Yeah, I heard 'em." Oh, Chicken, I'm sad to see you go. Let's hope Frosti can stick it out and represent for the oddly named folks on the Zhan Hu tribe.

As far as the rest of the episode goes, it was a typical start of a Survivor season with a slightly more intriguing backdrop. Thank God for the b-roll clips of Pandas climbing through trees rather than the snakes and insects that usually get featured in the tropical settings. We got glimpses into a few of the Survivors' personalities, but nothing so deep yet as to have us attached to anyone. For instance, we've got Courtney, the New York City Bitch, who glared at the Buddhist monk when he repeatedly fixed her stance during the "welcome" ceremony. And then there's Leslie, the Christian radio talk show host who managed to contradict herself in the same sentence after she refused to participate in what she considered to be idol worship and stated, "I'm not religious, but I am a follower of Jesus Christ." Huh? And finally, there's Jaime. I was convinced she hadn't said a word the entire episode until Guy reminded me that she was the one who proudly told Jeff, "I don't have a bra." When will these people learn to wear functional clothing every second of the day until they're given a map to their tribe's island? With season after season of contestants being forced to jump off boats and swim for their lives, you'd think people would start using their heads.

There is so much more I can say about last night's show, but I'll leave you to ponder the rest. Till next week...